THE FINEST AMUSEMENTS OF A BURGEONING ORANGE COUNTY

Studentiles of today and henceforth, salutations to the bustling suburbia just south of anything interesting. Looking for a fortnight getaway with your potential suitor to inherit your father's estate? You can't. The railroad tracks haven't been laid yet. Regardless, should your chariot's wheels stumble upon these twisted acres, you may find some worthwhile pleasures below:

1. Break into an orchard and throw fruits on the ground to watch them explode
2. Crash the chariot into the fountain whilst promoting public alcoholism
3. Lobby the ministry to permit the traveling circus
4. Fortell omens by use of countifying all of the ravens in the sky
5. Visit the castle upon the hill
6. Sign mysterious contracts in foreign languages
7. Make a family tree of the mice living in your walls
8. Advocate for the removal of long-established legislation
9. Investigate potentially pernicious local community leaders
10. Question the dogmatic teachings of the church