Possessed Roommate Actually Better Now

I started noticing something was off when my roommate (formerly known as Ryder Wade) came back from a night out and said, “Mortal, Grog want to get to know you better.” That was literally the first personal question he ever asked me.

The improvements have been astounding since then. Ryder would play Valorant and masturbate all day, but Grog… Grog just kinda sits and stares at me. He sometimes reads his ever-changing stone tablet (#doomscrolling) and every once and a while, his skin falls off.

His sleep schedule might be the only thing that hasn’t changed much, while Ryder would stay up all night on Discord with his high school girlfriend, Grog just… doesn’t sleep. I’m not exactly sure if he needs sleep… or food… sometimes he coughs up hairballs, but I think that’s something else.

The craziest part is that Grog gets way more play. He updated his Hinge to “Grog looking for love to last beyond the grave” with interests like “ritual sacrifice” and “exploring nether regions,” and apparently, it’s been popping off; he keeps bringing girls home… though I never see them leave.