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Stop Asking for My Snap, Connecting with me on LinkedIn is Sexier
Issue 81 | March 2026
Boys use Snapchat. Men use LinkedIn. And I’m looking for a man.

My Project Partner Sucks
Issue 81 | March 2026
He always has some bullshit excuse for not doing his work like “I’m sick,” or “I’m in traffic,” or “the blood on the floor is taking longer to clean up than I thought.”

I Am Uncool. Will Anyone Be My Valentine?
Issue 80 | February 2026
I’m also a bit dumb, too. I get straight B’s, and am currently a student at Chapman University.

Three Ways to Tell if Your Roommate is Gay or if There Really Was a Snake Bite "Down There"
Issue 80 | February 2026
Dedicated to Levi Mobasser, who is currently in the hospital for who knows what. Get well soon, I love you (no homo).

No Play on V-Day? Father Tom's Wise Words for Lonely Hearts
Issue 80 | February 2026
But why cry over it? Why sulk when there are answers out there, answers lying just beyond Schmid Gate?
Possessed Roommate Actually Better Now
Issue 78 | October 2025
The improvements have been astounding since then. Ryder would play Valorant and masturbate all day, but Grog… Grog just kinda sits and stares at me.
Last Minute Costume Ideas for 3rd (or 5th) Wheels
Issue 78 | October 2025
Perfect for you!
I'm Beginning to Think This Isn't a Frat
Issue 78 | October 2025
Making friends at Chapman is easier said than done (most things are once you get the hang of talking).
Sick of Campus Pro™? Here's How to Get Your Suite Back
Issue 78 | October 2025
If you miss your previous accommodations and think that this new program is not worth your $90,000 tuition, follow these simple steps to get your suite back.
New Top Frat: Join My Polycule
Issue 77 | September 2025
Do you ever get tired of flip-flops, formalwear, or the shackles of monogamous living? Well boy howdy, do I have good news for YOU!
MISSING: O-Week Companion... And My Heart...
Issue 77 | September 2025
It’s been a month since school started, bro, you can’t still be “hella busy w class n shi.”
Help Wanted: Spiritual Liberal
Issue 77 | September 2025
That’s right, I’m talking to you.



